01 - Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease and line an 8-inch cake pan with parchment paper.
02 - Whisk flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder, and salt together in a medium bowl until evenly combined.
03 - In a large bowl, beat softened butter and granulated sugar until light and fluffy. Incorporate eggs one at a time, mixing well after each addition. Stir in vanilla extract.
04 - Add dry ingredients to butter mixture alternately with buttermilk, mixing on low speed just until combined.
05 - Blend hot water into the batter until fully smooth. Pour batter into prepared cake pan.
06 - Bake for 25 to 30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center emerges clean. Allow cake to cool completely in pan.
07 - Crumble cooled cake into a large bowl. Add cream cheese frosting, mixing until a moldable dough forms. Shape mixture into 1-inch balls and arrange on a parchment-lined tray.
08 - Freeze cake balls for 20 minutes to firm up.
09 - Melt white candy melts or white chocolate in a microwave-safe bowl, following package instructions.
10 - Dip the end of each lollipop stick in melted chocolate, then push into each chilled cake ball. Refrigerate for 10 minutes to set.
11 - Immerse each cake ball in melted white chocolate, let excess drip off, and anchor upright in a styrofoam block or cake pop stand. Allow coating to harden.
12 - Once set, use colored candy melts, edible marker pens, or decorating gel to create irises and pupils. Add red decorating gel for a bloodshot effect where desired.
13 - Allow decorations to set completely before serving or packaging.